If I only knew what happened next . . .

maybe i would not be so scared
maybe i would not be so overwhelmed
maybe i would not feel so out of place
maybe i would be able to let myself experience the life i am now in
maybe i would be able to get to know these amazing people i have met
maybe i would not feeling like running away
maybe i would feel okay

. . . but I don't get to know what happens next.

So in the end I just have to keep trying, keep waking up, keep doing my best to be real and present, keep making myself grounded (so I don't take off running) and figure out what to do now that I am here in Columbus.