I wish I was able to articulate in words the things that I am currently thinking and those things that stood out to me, that were part of conversations that I experienced and observed tonight.

Currently I am not a big fan of semantics, of terminology, of denominational perspectives and backgrounds and blinders. I dislike that I am biased by where I have come and that it has the possibility to influence where I am going. Not that the influence is flat out negative, I just want to be able to look at something with fresh eyes and not through some one else's glasses, whether it be the Assemblies of God, Vineyard, Luthern, Methodist or Mennonite.

To me this is not about rejecting my past or the foundation my relationship with God/faith was built on . . . it is about a true, honest and real pursuit of what it means to follow Christ and what living out a commitment to Christ looks like in this life. And I just don't want to take someone else's word for it . . . I don't want to be able to recite some new list of beliefs and ways of life (as I could recite the doctrine and theology of the Assemblies) . . . I want to be changed, I want to be convinced, I want to search for truth and understanding. I want the Spirit to speak to me, to completely direct this undertaking.

Is that okay? Does that make any sense?

Today I was both told I was drunk and asked if I was high . . . simply because I appeared giddy . . . the reason for my giddyness . . . I haven't got a clue, but I enjoyed it. It was as though I felt very much alive today, in a way I have not felt in a really long time. It is not everyday I jump off the stairs and let out a great big loud "Woo Hoo" and the top of my lungs. Hopefully I will be able to do the same tomorrow.

So here is to giddyness and understanding.

Peace.